Gossips : 10 Effective Ways To Tackle The Idiots

Posted on Posted in A-Z, How to, Social

Rumor, Gossip : 10 Effective Ways To Deal With The Idiots

It is a horribly annoying feeling being a part of a rumor, especially when people are spreading false messages about you and there doesn’t seem to be a direct way to handle them. And it really sucks when people don;t understand that they are hurting you by creating rumors about you and it is even worse when they keep doing it even when they know that it hurts.

There are of course a few ways you can handle these gossipy mouths and carry on with your life. Here are 10 creative ways to deal with rumor

1) WHY People spread RUMOR? 

 why gossips, why people talk about you, motivation for gossip, gossiping peoplePeople rarely spread a rumor about the ones they like or love. In fact they would like to stand up and defend someone making fun of the ones they like.

If someone is spreading a rumor about you, it either means that you don’t have that special bond with them which is completely natural – No everyone can be your friend or maybe they are jealous of you or they are just talking about it because it is a great source of entertainment and they cannot hold it to themselves and it makes them feel important when they spread that rumor and they feel that people are paying attention to them.

Different people have different reasons for spreading a rumor and each one of them is weirder than the other, but the common ones always corner to the want of attention, sometimes from people around them or sometimes from the person who they are spreading rumor about.

Most sites and people tell you to avoid them which is very natural and right as well, but it is equally important for you to be curios and understand why they are doing it in order to tackle the REAL PROBLEM


 how to confront people, how to ask someone to stop gossiping, communication skills

Talk to this person who is spreading the rumor about you. Don’t tell him/her how upset you are, don’t flare on them. You have one opportunity to talk to this person in an open and free manner, make sure you get the best out of it.

Be the bigger person, talk to them, ask them how they heard the rumor, tell them that it is ok and tell them that at a certain level it is indeed funny. But try finding out why they are doing it in the first place.

Remember, it is very easy to shout at someone and even ask them to stop or be angry and fight with them. It takes a slightly bigger person to raise above that. The only reason is that even if you shout at them and make them stop, they will not stop permanently,People will always do what they want to do! and even if they don’t do it in front of you, they might do it behind your  back. You don’t want that, you can be slightly clever and nip it in the bud.

Try and understand why they are doing it.


 preventing gossips, stop people from gossipingGive them the benefit of the doubt, tell them how it makes you feel when you hear such words. Ask them to put themselves in your situation and feel what you feel, tell them that it is hard to face such untrue facts about you on a regular basis, tell them why  you feel that it is unfair and tell them how hard it is making your life.

Most people spread rumors since they don’t know its real impact on your life, it is not that they don’t care about you, it is just that they are not sensitive enough, it is that they do not understand its impact on you. Introduce what it means to you and how it is hurting your life. People can be jerks or asses but they cannot be inhuman, you just need to make them understand YOU


 prevent gossips, laugh at rumors, laugh at gossips, sense of humor and gossipsMost people indulge in rumor, gossip as a way to spend time, to find something in a jest of humor, to find something to laugh about and move past it.

Take it in the light side, try thinking of it from a neutral stand point. I do agree that it is very hard and it is also very hard to have that anger boiling in you, but like we said –

There is a greater glory in being a BIGGER MAN than responding to the silly things


neglect gossips, neglect rumor, ignore gossip, ignore rumorIf none of these ideas work, neglect the rumor, pretend that it doesn’t have any effect on you. Most of them stop making fun of you or making rumors or gossips on you the moment they realize that you don’t even care about it.

In fact you can even go a notch higher and make fun of yourself. This shows how much above the situation you are and people rarely would want to try to bother you there.


people gossip because you are important, important people have gossipsOne thing is for sure, most times the ones people make fun of or spread rumors on are the ones who are most sought after. It might be the prettiest girl in class or the smartest boy in school or an outstanding employee in Office.

So, if people are talking about you, it simply means that you are of prime importance and you are a part of their lives already without even their knowledge.

Feel a little proud that people are actually showing interest in you to spread a rumor. You can actually kinda enjoy it as well.


Dont spread rumors, dont talk about other people, dont gossipSome of these gossip mongers don’t deserve your time. Know that the people who don’t matter either don’t care about it or they will talk to you about it. The entire gossip world is just making you famous and you just have to find a way to make the best use of it. Like we said, it is just about being a little smart.

And something of key importance is that if you don’t want people to spread a gossip about you, stay away from spreading one about others. Minimize talking negative about others, look at the positives, talk about only them and just neglect the negatives.

People rarely find it encouraging to spread a rumor on someone who is always telling good words about them. They can’t take the risk of missing out on good publicity you see!


threaten gossip monger, complain about gossips, prevent gossips, avoid gossipsSometimes if nothing works, then it is the ultimate way ahead. It is unfortunate when people don’t try and understand how they are hurting you even after repeated information about the same. If you are dealing with such horrible jackasses, then the best way ahead is to introduce a little bit of  fear.

If it is the school or office, tell them that this directly goes to the dean or the superior in office, tell them that as much as you would hate to do this, it is hurting you in a X,Y,Z manner and tell them that if that doesn’t stop, it will go to the next level which would make things very ugly for both sides


strength against gossips, how to handle gossips, facing gossips, overcome gossipsSometimes, the idiots do rally on the weaker ones, they think that it is fun to put someone down just for the sake of a few laughters. Let them know how strong you are, let them know that it doesn’t bother you.

And if it does, stand up to them, talk some sense into them, tell them how deep the consequences can be and how easy it is to spread a rumor in utter disregard about a person’s feelings


scare rumor monger, threaten rumors, threaten gossips, prevent gossips.You can respect someone, you can also respect a sense of humor and you can also respect the need to laugh, but you cannot afford to respect someone taking you for granted.

We are in a world where humanity is the ultimate goal and realization and it has to be that way. If someone is behaving childish, well let them know what a childish prank can lead to and this can be induction of fear or sometimes even a strong complaint!

Either ways, tell them that it is not OK and it cannot go on this way!


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28 thoughts on “Gossips : 10 Effective Ways To Tackle The Idiots

    1. That’s the most ideal way to go about it Ravish. But somehow many of them take advantage of this and start influencing others as well. I agree that we should not budge about it, but at the same time we have to do something to keep things in order..

      1. What kind of order, Vinay? If we are in order within then no rumor can tarnish us. We have only control on ourselves and our attitudes. The only thing matters is our perspectives.

        1. Perhaps Ravish, I agree that our perspectives will make the most difference. There will be some of those rumors which one can cast off, not even listen to them and move ahead with our lives. But there will be some other which actually undermine the very thing you do, for those we need to give an answer. It might not be a straight forward one, but sometimes it can be a very subtle one and can be shown through our actions. As for the rumor, it is an independent entity, but like you said if we are in control and find a way to use that rumor for the best of our advantage, then life can be quite a blessing 🙂

  1. Nice post Vinay, I do agree with all your points. Though as Ravish commented that people are free to think whatever they want to think is also true, but then it is also true that we got affected because of rumors.

    1. Thank you Alok. True, people are free to think what they want, but to tell the same, they are really not. I wish there was a way to sue such people sometimes. It would have built in a strange sense of order and a stranger sense of annoyance though 😀

    2. Yes, we get affected but only when we allow those to affect us. Suppose If I were to insult you, you’d most likely make the choice of being offended. And if I were to pay you a complement, you’d most likely make the choice of being pleased or flattered. But think about it: it’s still a choice.

      1. True Ravish, when it comes to absolutism and some rumors, we can steer away from them, But when you realize that there is something which is constantly acting as an impediment to you and you know that an action on that front would solve the problem for you, then perhaps it is something which needs an action.

        As for the choice of being offended or being complimented, I am still a very normal man who is most likely to be affected by them. But you are absolutely right, it is all about the matter of choice and if the choice is to make the best of it, then nothing like that 🙂

  2. Well..rumours sometimes can really be injurious to our health and reputation…I agree to your points but rumours which are spread out of jealousy are more dangerous and there’s actually no help talking to those people…they never admit their fault even if caught red-handed…I’ve witnessed an incident regarding my friend and hence speaking by experience…..

    1. Thank you Maniparna :). True indeed, not many agree at all, infact they slyly move away from it and make you feel guilty for confronting them. They are pretty smart people and come with a strong talent and ability to what they do. I guess we have to keep finding creative ways to hold them by the neck and solve the problem!

  3. Informative as usual. If you ask the person who you think is spreading rumour, the person will deny. If you tell your side of story, be prepared for further distortion. One who is malicious enough to spread rumour, will be unlikely to be open to fact.

    1. Thank you Abhijit :). True indeed, not many people agree to spreading a rumor, not many would take responsibility for it or its consequences and if you confront them, they even dodge it in every way possible. I guess for such people nothing works better than a threat!

  4. NUMBER 9 ! Definitely!… These rumor creating rude people should be tracked down and taught a lesson, these are just gossip gangs who have nothing constructive to do…and unless someone tells them off they won’t understand. Once someone did this to me, I confronted her and served her my ultra-hot sauce in the ear… I added “right now I am dealing with you on one-on-one thinking you will understand but if you didn’t, my next conversation with you would be with more people, I am making a mental list of people who should know all this about you now” after that she understood that behind an all-nice, supportive and smiling ‘me’ lies a person who has no accommodation for nonsense like this. From that day on, not just her but her whole gang understood that I am strong enuf to handle lil stupid morons. hehe.. Her face was worth a pic..sad I couldn’t ask for a pic in that kind of scene… hehe..

    1. Thank you Jyoti :). I agree, they should be caught by the neck and forced to stop sometimes. The worst part is when they realize that it is hurting someone and they still continue doing it because they find it funny. Highly insensitive and horribly annoying from all ends..

      That was a really nice way to deal with that person, a good threat sometimes is the perfect requirement. That was some real good action on that front Jyoti. Thanks so much for sharing it here, I am sure this will come in handy for a lot of them 🙂

    1. Thank you Jyoti, missed you around here. My deepest apologies for not being able to convert that post. I am stuck writing a few essays for application and most of my creativity is stuck. Really very sorry for not being able to take that project ahead 🙁

  5. How to Deal with Gossips!! well kill people who spread it 😛 on a serious note maintain your dignity clarify your stand. Excellent post

  6. Yea, that is also a very strong point and an angle to think upon. Esp when it comes to gossip mongers whose only motivation is to make fun of people or have fun at someone’s expense, everything acts as a feeder and they seem to use it remarkably well. Sometimes it makes me feel that they really do deserve a punch in the nose!

  7. Not all gossips are rumours though….I once became a talk of the town because some aunty saw me talking and laughing with a guy publicly…All she did was spread the word..she didn’t rumour about anything …she just gossiped what she saw and apparently gossips spread like fire and when it passes ear to ear there is coat of spice added to it. I and mom went to confront her and had a heart to heart talk….she apologized to my mom…but the damage was already done….finally what happened, in the fear of society my mom requested me not to speak to guys in public cos, she had 3 daughters to raise in this cruel world….

    1. Gee that’s really sad to hear Vidhya. Perhaps I will never understand why people are so hell bent on imposing their views of the world, society and culture over everyone around them. I mean each one of us has a private life of our own and we would like to live that way. Granted that there will be rumors and gossips about us, but they all do have a limit. As long as they don’t hurt someone – they are ok. But the moment they start hurting someone, it is time to back off and maybe also realize that when it comes to sensitive issues, it is not really cool to gossip or spread rumors. There are a lot of emotions attached behind. I wish there was a way to make them a little more sensitive..

  8. I am a straight person. When a shopkeeper stare at me, unfortunately I also stare at him back. Then he and friends started to stare at me and whisper. Me and my friends went to this guys and told them don’t disturb us students. After this incident,they started to spread that I am a GAY.They spread this to the entire residential area.Now Planning to leave that area because people are behaving very badly to me.

    1. I am so sorry to hear that Prash. The society sure is a B word sometimes. It was the right thing for you to go an talk to that guy. I wonder why he started spreading that rumor though, was it just cos his ego was hurt or was he trying to teach some bullshit lesson or some other twisted reason like that?
      I sometimes don;t really understand how these gossips stem, they are so baseless and they so easily borderline on hurting the emotions of people. It is quite a pickle mate. Leaving the area will certainly solve the problem for the time being. I am just trying to think out loud if there is an alternate solution to these horrible gossip mongers.

      My two cents
      1) Maybe talk to him and check with him why he thinks so or why he says so – just a heart to heart conversation. Maybe make him realize how it is affecting your lifestyle and how much you would appreciate him understanding your situation. I know that you have every right to be furious, but that would atleast give him the ego massage he needs and he might actually comply with you and may even stand for you if that works
      2) Ignore – Now this is very hard, esp when the society joins in the source of the gossip. It may not be the best idea in this scenario. But maybe treating it wilh a bit of humor might help, making light of it and you joining the laughter? Sometimes people stop when they realize it is not making an impact on you.
      3) The simplest thing might seem to be seen with a girl all the time. Now that might defeat the purpose of actually being in a relationship but in this situation, it might give the temporary relief. But again I would suggest you not to do this cos for them, it just fuels in new ideas. The best thing to do sometimes is to not react at all and let that idiotic behavior pass. As long as you don’t give your self respect into the hands of the stupid society, it should be alright..

      Hope atleast one of these help, do lemme know your thoughts mate 🙂

  9. Even i am facing same problem. one idiot proposed me 1 year back, i rejected. he said lets be as friend i accepted. after few months later he again started asking love me, so again i rejected. so he got angry on me and started spreading badly on me with others like ” she loved me and cheated, she is a fake girl, she is a flirting girl, she spoiled my life, i lost all because of her.” like this he is saying something badly on me and spreading to all in social media too. she is blackmailing me now by keeping my photo which took when we was friends. its just a selfie photo. he is blackmailing by keeping that.” give me 50,000 rs within 24th of this month or else i will come to your home and show to your dad and say badly on you” my parents are strict, they love me, i don’t wanna hurt them. so i decided to give him money. i am struggling lot to arrange money because i am still a student, i am not working. i am crying daily by his torture. need to kill this type of idiots ..

  10. Even I am facing same problem. One idiot proposed me 1 year back, I rejected. He said lets be as friend I accepted. After few months later he again started asking love me, so again I rejected. so he got angry on me and started spreading badly on me with others like ” she loved me and cheated, she is a fake girl, she is a flirting girl, she spoiled my life, I lost all because of her.” like this he is saying something badly on me and spreading to all in social media too. He is blackmailing me now by keeping my photo which took when we were friends. It’s just a selfie photo. he is blackmailing by keeping that.” give me 50,000 rs within 24th of this month or else I will come to your home and show to your dad and say badly on you” my parents are strict, they love me, I don’t want to hurt them. So I decided to give him money. I am struggling lot to arrange money because I am still a student, I am not working. I am crying daily by his torture. Need to kill this type of idiots

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