It was my gym’s annual event. I went all prepared as if I was going to win the world. The event started late as per the Indian Stretchable Time, an hour late from the IST. You can’t blame them, it was a Sunday morning. Events started and I was the first one to participate from the women section. I put my strength and threw the shot put. Hurray! It was 2.35 mts. Then comes the other participants throwing 4mts and above and that’s when I realized mine was the least of all. “Don’t lose your heart! You have many more competitions” I assured myself. I tried rest of the others and then on every time I was either the last but one or last but two to finish. I guess you can title me as a loser. I played 6 events and didn’t win any. As they say participation is more important than winning, I was happy about it. That’s my mantra when i come last in anything :)
I had lost in every event but I felt great about something. Can you take a guess? Nah! Not about participation. There was someone who gave up before me or someone who finished after me in every event from then on. Oh yea I felt so good when someone performed worse than me :) For every event I made sure I gave up after someone else did. Sometimes it feels good not to be the first person to give up and I know it feels great to not to give up at all but I guess it’ll take sometime for me to reach there.
Don’t I sound a little sadistic who enjoyed seeing someone fail? Call me anything! it did make me feel better. When you can compare yourself with someone better than you and feel bad then why can’t you compare yourself with someone bad and feel good? If comparison with the better ones challenges you telling “come on! You have to beat him!” then comparison with the worse ones tells you “You are not the only one! There are worse performers!”
Competition is mostly with oneself. Right? I totally agree with it and try to follow but it feels motivating to accept challenges from better performers and feels comfortable to take consolation looking at the worse ones . You need not feel bad for your performance as there is always something to feel good about, either the participation or looking at someone fail worse than you :) You always have something to be happy about :)
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Vidhyashree ! Participation matters :-) as there are some who even dont take one step ahead, to participate, so kudos to you for trying :-) Cheers.
I was the one who didn’t take part in competitions earlier but it’s fun now and true participation matters :) And that’s how I console myself most of the times :D
I guess the cliche ‘it is the participation that matters’ actually means that till you are trying you are in the race, and you are getting better.
But there is such a thing as knowing when to quit too, I think.
True Nimi, I would like to believe I am still in the race and am getting better :)
I guess it only after repeated trying and failing you realise if it’s worth carrying ahead and sometimes you do learn when to quit and why :)
it never made me feel better to look at the ones who fared worse then me… I try but can’t feel a thing :/ BUT SOMEHOW I always found something to cheer about after losing …. mostly a good book with a cup of coffee or a bottle of coke :P
He he Kokila I think you are too good as a person not to feel better looking at a worse performer :D But good to know you always find something to cheer up.
Oh yea good book and a cup of tea work wonders with me :)
True :D
It feels good to compare oneself with an inferior one, gives us some confidence. It was so authentic.
Aaah! Ha Ha finally their is someone like me who looks at an inferior and feel confident :D :D
Good to know Anmol :)
first of all sorry to use the reply button to post a comment :) I have some issue with my browser probbaly
Right .. if we look then in every race usually there is only ONE Winner and the rest are all failures or losers .. so if we lose there is nothing to be ashamed of we are with the majority :) thats what I feel each time I fail in something
but the idea is that when we fail we should work harder for next time :) although I too must say it feel a little good t osee someone lagging behind one self tooo :) and i am not being sadistic
Bikram’s
I never saw this approach “ONE Winner and the rest are all failures or losers” :D If you lose you are always with the mah