“The hammer that shatters glass also forges steel. The hammer is the same, the question is whether we are made up of glass or steel”
I think it is a very tricky affair to write about motivation. Somewhere unknowingly we get sucked into the brand of preaching even though we try to rationalize that we are not. Over the last few posts, I notice that it is time that we play our role here. As I reiterate again, we are not here to magically inspire or motivate you. But there is one thing we are really good at – asking questions and we shall try and stick to that. The moment you feel that we are moving away from that, please do let us know cos end of the day, we want these posts to be useful and not just another one written for the sake of it.
Stress Brings Out Character! – The greatest weapon against stress!
Now, as we begin to question, I would love to stick to the reference that stress brings out character, it brings out who we really are and our capacities. It all looks great in the hindsight and it also looks like a great moral to live by – constantly telling ourselves that we are building character. But we also know that at times it does get exhausting no matter how many times we tell ourselves that we are building character. We get tired and the quotes start seeming a little meaningless as well.
Stress Has A Way Of Screwing Us Up
Stress sure has a way of affecting us and it certainly screws up the thought process we are under. Ever notice the times that you are depressed – you start focusing on all the things that are bad in your life. The moment you have a fight with your significant other, you start thinking of all the bad things that they have done in the past and you slowly start hating them a bit? Ever noticed that when you are feeling low or bad, how easy it is for the others around you or the other things around you to piss you off to the extent of your nerves?
It Is The Same You Isn’t It – The greatest weapon against stress!
But very interestingly, matters of graver intensity don’t seem to affect you at all when you are at your best state of mind. What changed? It is the same you isn’t it? It is the same you who handles things magically well and it is the same you who screws up even the best things you have in life. Does it mean that you and I are simply the puppets of time and the state of our mind? Isn’t the concept of self improvement or self development that we control our thoughts and not the vice versa? Or isn’t it at least that we control the quality of our thoughts and hence the quality of our lives?
Choosing One Thought Over Another
I guess, the answer for this is in William Jamera who says that the greatest weapon against stress is the ability to choose one thought over another. Let us for instance assume that we have that super power. When we are low, instead of thinking of the bad things around us – replace it with curiosity. What are the questions you will ask?
I am guessing, instead of asking “Why me?”, you might ask – what else can this mean? What is the message it is sending me? What is the purpose and use of this?
Instead of telling – This is pulling me down and it always happens to me. Why not question – Is there a pattern here. If so, what can I do to break this pattern?
Instead of saying – The Universe is out there to screw me over. What if we ask, what can I do to screw it back?
I think there are a lot of interesting questions we can ask and various creative ways we can choose our thoughts over the other. Stress comes because of various reasons and we dealt with them all in our 9 Creative ways of dealing with tension. There are tonnes of stuff that keep happening around us. This is real life and these are real experiences which we feel every single day in our lives. And the more we look toward improving the quality of those, the better control we have over the quality of our life long term as well. As we recall,
Life is not just one big achievement we sign off the list, it is a whole set of beautiful things which we feel and face every single day!
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Product Director with 10+ years in leadership roles - team building, product strategy, coaching and mentoring are a part of my everyday responsibilities. I write about motivational words that inspire us and shape our thinking and help us go beyond these thoughts to find what our minds are telling us and evolve.
Well… it seems more like our Sherlock Holmes… this sort of detective stuff is not easy to make(: … its sophiticated… but there are enough ditective programs that would have easier guided the making of a perfect detective movie with plot… your seen Oceans 11, 12 and 13… you must… they are gangters and threifts but even then funny guys and good guys(:… I think that’s brilliant… making a thriller in a way without the crimes and violence and negative feelings(:
He he :D .. Well it kinda is exciting that way isn’t it Maria? I mean if we are in a process of trying to detect what is right and wrong and then try to fix it and then know that it is all leading somewhere. Gosh, life suddenly becomes an amazing adventure :).
I loved all the three movies of the ocean series Maria, they are quite brilliantly made. Clooney, Matt Demon, Brad Pitt, gosh what better crew to ask for and the way they make a crime look so well detailed is simply brilliant! Do watch Usual Suspects if you haven’t watched already, that too is one of my favourite ones :)
Actually I gave the last comment for a movie blog and by mistake I posted it here… no its not detective stuff, if it is only psychology can help us… I don’t know sontimes there are no cures for a issue and things end up getting worst… really it depends… but life is short and one has to be smart or less good oppurtunities leave and that is the worst right?… when you can do things right you should, if you are not able to that is another matter, that case just don’t get worked up!!…anyway goodday… glad you liked the oceans movie, is still entertaining, just hard complex stuff done easily without stres, even when in trouble I don’t think too much stress affected them… it’s indeed very interesting and nice.
Well… if one is stressed its better not to face life for a while and take a break… true it brings out the real us, tests us, even than its better to not think of self, get out of self and check out the whole picture without too much of you in it… everyone faces difficult times and everyone has different ways of handling it… so never feel you are alone and never expect things to turn out just fine, be prepared to struggle and fight… thoughts are impt, just don’t think too much too quickly… think little with with valid points and supplement it with action. Anyway…goodday
In essence I completely agree with you Maria, sometimes we need a distraction and a way to look at the problems and make them appear smaller than they actually feel. A little sense of humour about the problems help, so does a good distraction. Sometimes it deserves a deep thought and sometimes just a drink and some good sleep :). Either ways, I think we all have a mechanism and a way to deal with stress and our life quality in general. Any of those ideas which can make life a little easier can be a great deal indeed :)
Awesome, Vinay. I like the last quote- “Life is not just one big achievement it is a whole set of beautiful things which we feel and face every single day!”.
Thank you Kashpal, He he I will full credit to that quote :). I kinda like that concept of living life one instance at a time and making those small instances beautiful and life automatically finds a way of falling into that groove. Little things sure mean a lot :)
True Maniparna. It is perhaps one of the hardest things to do, to get out of that comfort zone and test ourselves. But what it leaves us with in the end is something incredible and extremely powerful. Life becomes a much more enjoyable journey.
Thank you Maniparna, I was trying to get back to our old writing style. Kinda felt that a few of the recent ones had taken on the preaching mode. Wanted to steer clear from that and get back to our questioning mode. I guess that is something we are really good at or I would like to believe so ;)..
Thank you Somali. True, it is all in our hands. Unfortunately in the midst of a busy life, we tend to forget that for a moment. It is good to keep reevaluating ourselves sometimes so that we can bring it all back on the track, just the way we like it :)
Thank you Maitreni. Anything to make a slight improvement in the quality of our lives and if stress can do that or if we can take stress to that level where it helps us, then nothing better than that! :)
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Well… it seems more like our Sherlock Holmes… this sort of detective stuff is not easy to make(: … its sophiticated… but there are enough ditective programs that would have easier guided the making of a perfect detective movie with plot… your seen Oceans 11, 12 and 13… you must… they are gangters and threifts but even then funny guys and good guys(:… I think that’s brilliant… making a thriller in a way without the crimes and violence and negative feelings(:
He he :D .. Well it kinda is exciting that way isn’t it Maria? I mean if we are in a process of trying to detect what is right and wrong and then try to fix it and then know that it is all leading somewhere. Gosh, life suddenly becomes an amazing adventure :).
I loved all the three movies of the ocean series Maria, they are quite brilliantly made. Clooney, Matt Demon, Brad Pitt, gosh what better crew to ask for and the way they make a crime look so well detailed is simply brilliant! Do watch Usual Suspects if you haven’t watched already, that too is one of my favourite ones :)
Actually I gave the last comment for a movie blog and by mistake I posted it here… no its not detective stuff, if it is only psychology can help us… I don’t know sontimes there are no cures for a issue and things end up getting worst… really it depends… but life is short and one has to be smart or less good oppurtunities leave and that is the worst right?… when you can do things right you should, if you are not able to that is another matter, that case just don’t get worked up!!…anyway goodday… glad you liked the oceans movie, is still entertaining, just hard complex stuff done easily without stres, even when in trouble I don’t think too much stress affected them… it’s indeed very interesting and nice.
Well… if one is stressed its better not to face life for a while and take a break… true it brings out the real us, tests us, even than its better to not think of self, get out of self and check out the whole picture without too much of you in it… everyone faces difficult times and everyone has different ways of handling it… so never feel you are alone and never expect things to turn out just fine, be prepared to struggle and fight… thoughts are impt, just don’t think too much too quickly… think little with with valid points and supplement it with action. Anyway…goodday
In essence I completely agree with you Maria, sometimes we need a distraction and a way to look at the problems and make them appear smaller than they actually feel. A little sense of humour about the problems help, so does a good distraction. Sometimes it deserves a deep thought and sometimes just a drink and some good sleep :). Either ways, I think we all have a mechanism and a way to deal with stress and our life quality in general. Any of those ideas which can make life a little easier can be a great deal indeed :)
Awesome, Vinay. I like the last quote- “Life is not just one big achievement it is a whole set of beautiful things which we feel and face every single day!”.
Thank you Kashpal, He he I will full credit to that quote :). I kinda like that concept of living life one instance at a time and making those small instances beautiful and life automatically finds a way of falling into that groove. Little things sure mean a lot :)
Excellent, Vinay, Excellent! This is advice that everyone would do well to pay heed to!
Thank you Lata :). Thanks so much, happy you liked it.. The article kinda helped me get my mojo back :)
When we are out of our comfort zone, the real test begins there, similarly stress does help to bring out several thoughts to get over from it…
Written from a great perspective, Vinay…liked it… :-)
True Maniparna. It is perhaps one of the hardest things to do, to get out of that comfort zone and test ourselves. But what it leaves us with in the end is something incredible and extremely powerful. Life becomes a much more enjoyable journey.
Thank you Maniparna, I was trying to get back to our old writing style. Kinda felt that a few of the recent ones had taken on the preaching mode. Wanted to steer clear from that and get back to our questioning mode. I guess that is something we are really good at or I would like to believe so ;)..
Very true Vinay. True character reveals when one is under duress…and yes none butwe are responsible for selecting one thought over the other.
Thank you Somali. True, it is all in our hands. Unfortunately in the midst of a busy life, we tend to forget that for a moment. It is good to keep reevaluating ourselves sometimes so that we can bring it all back on the track, just the way we like it :)
Very poignantly expressed Vinay. I could quite relate to the point “Stress brings out character”. Indeed true!
Thank you Maitreni. Anything to make a slight improvement in the quality of our lives and if stress can do that or if we can take stress to that level where it helps us, then nothing better than that! :)