Oh the long awaited Sunday is here! All I wanted today was to be with Me, Me and Me alone. As I woke up late I realized there are guests at home and as always I brought out my best behaviour :P . We were on the breakfast table and I was enjoying my meal until the uncle shoots his questions at me“Why did you opt for this job? What is your degree percentage? What happened to the couple of job interviews you attended? What’s the salary? You have better options! “And what not!
I became uncomfortable. I looked deep into my plate and hesitated to answer the first two questions and gave him explanations which failed under his perspective. When the third question was on me I lost my patience and abruptly said “I didn’t get the job I interviewed for!” All of a sudden I was proud of my voice! I kicked the hesitation and I was like “Bring on the questions :)“. Later on I answered just in a word without any explanations. There I was! The coolest girl in the room.
Most of the times I was uncomfortable to answer about my academic percentages with a feeling of being an average student, not realizing that being average is fine as the marks don’t define me or anyone. Failures don’t define us but we hesitate to accept, sometimes in front of others and many times to self. I felt inferior for many years and now I see I was a fool :) a fool to underestimate oneself.
There would be people around to pick on your failures, say “You are lucky” on your success, they love to keep their perspective even if you are least interested, they want to say what’s good and what’s bad for you, now the question is “What’s good for you?” Can you let the other person upset you? I have learnt the best way to reply today, all I know is to say “I appreciate your concern, my life is going great!”
Sometimes it’s fun to be questioned by these kinds of people just to realize People will make you feel like crap, but its up to you to let them! :)
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“now I see I was a fool, a fool to underestimate oneself.”…that is an amazing set of words…the best i have read in your blog so far. simple effective and strong… loved it!!!! may i please share these words with my friends? As far as the post is concerned, I too have been through several people who consider that we are privileged to hear their advice!! :O its best we put a stop to it by speaking out at the right time…like you have mentioned. well written :) I guess i have grown out of all those times…and learned from them.
Thank you Preethi, thanks so much :). The credit goes to Vidya, it is completely her words all through :). I am sure she will be extremely happy seeing this.. Oh yes yes please :).
I really hate the way they patronize when people give us advise or gyaan, esp when we don’t want any, that too from them! Well, having said that, I guess everything has a place in our lives and perhaps these too. Maybe how we start responding to them makes all the difference :)
Thank you Preeti :) It’s so common for us to face these people who always want to drag us to their level of thoughts . Happy to know you liked it and makes me want to write more :)
So true…people will walk all over you only if you allow them to.Love your bold way of giving it back to him.You only become more learned with every failure.Nice read!
Thank you Vinodni :). Welcome to Inspire99, nice to see your thoughts on the post. The credit definitely goes to Vidya, I have always loved the idea of standing up to something you believe in, the spirit of rebellion has been an amazing and an eternal source of energy. To know that this was displayed so well is a beautiful feeling :)
Thank You Vinodini :) You are right. It’s very uncomfortable to speak to people like these but once we stand for what we are, rest of all is very easy.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Focus on your own achievements and blessings, and realize that you have probably come a long way.
Nice post Vinay !!
we should try to let go of such people in life for a happier world !!! :)
Thank you Veena, the credit goes to Vidya for the beautiful post :). True, I think we should start letting go quite a lot of them to be happier. That’s what I guess is called growing up, kinda sucks though :D
True true true…….
It would be nice to hear from elders too if they feel such situations cropping up even now.Eventually we(youngsters) can comfort saying its a generation gap of interpreting :) :)
Well,having said that, one should be able to distnguish between real well wishers to others for our own well being.
Thank you Satya :). Oh I am sure the elderly folks would also feel the same. I am a firm believer that life is a fair circle. If there is a 30 year old giving gyaan to a 20, then there is a 40 year old for the 30 and so on… ;). It has to be a fair game right? ;) :D
:)
This is a wonderful post- frequently, particularly youngsters are bound to face this problem of questions from those who are seemingly their well wishers. Your decision on the way to respond is apt & superb..
Thank You Rajeev. This incident was the highlight of the day. It’s an every house problem and I have faced a lot in fact. No matter how well you do in life there are people to point out one or the other. Let them enjoy there freedom of speech and let us enjoy our lives :)
Nice to read…felt nice. Freedom zindabaad. And yes remember this is one BIG milestone too. So Congratulations for that. Another thing once u realize that people not only make u feel like crap but also have the tendency to harm you…I suggest don’t go out of ur way thinking ur goodness will bring them around. That never happens. My suggestion…just stay away from such…ie once you realize. Ur own experiences will teach u what I mean. Stay happy…and once again cheers to that…what u did.
Thank you Shivani, nice to hear from you :). I certainly agree, it is a BIG milestone for sure.
He he, I agree, Gandhigiri might not be the best thing, but here is an article where we did find Gandhigiri a little impressive -https://inspire99.com/gandhigiri-why-not/
Above all it is happiness that matters the most. I am sure Vidya will be extremely happy reading such a lovely comment.
Cheers,
V+
Thank you Shivani . Finally I found a way to brave my uncle :D I have gone out of my way to please a few before but never would I do that again. Thank you for cheering up :)
Many people are too interested in other people’s business, and are very generous with unwanted questions and unsolicited advice. You are absolutely correct: it’s up to you whether or not to let such people affect you.
He he, so very true. I still fail to understand why people are pouncing with suggestions and advices, esp when we don’t want to be anywhere near them? Is it a vicarious victory, is it the addiction to give gyaan, or is it plain supercilious behaviour trying to look down upon us? Gosh, if only we could tell them all these…
People will make you feel like crap, but only if you let them! http://t.co/3gzLZdClo1