Dove: How Ugly You Think You Are

What are the words we use to define ourselves? What image of ourselves do we have? Is it the same as others see us or is it completely different? And if it is different how different is it? Does making any change in the definition make any difference to our lives?

Well, here is a video which explains the same to you, have a look at this beautiful video and we continue below :

Now, let’s ask you this:

How do you describe yourself?

What are the words you use to define yourself?

Fat? Ugly? Person having a crooked tooth, maybe frizzly hair or darker complexion – what are these words that you use to define yourself when someone asks about you. How exactly would you define yourself. Although I am being a little dramatic with the use of stronger words, would you use more neutral words. I mean how do you define yourself, what characteristics would you define if someone wants to make a portrait of you?

If you watched the video above, you realize that most people define themselves a lot worse than others do. In other words, others see a lot more beauty in you than you do yourself. Now, why is that? Aren’t you the person who knows yourself the best? Why do you want to describe yourself in a much more modest way as compared to someone else describing you? Why do you want to use more neutral words? Is it the idea of modesty? Is it the social protocol that you don’t talk well about yourself? What is it?

What if you define yourself like this?

What if you use completely different words to define yourself? What if you stood in front of the mirror and appreciated your features a bit? What if you acknowledged the beautiful hair, the uniqueness in the shape of your nose or the colour of your eyes or the way you smile? What if you told yourself how beautiful you are. What if you chose these metaphors to define yourself?

Well, you might think – “What would other people think of me? They won’t think I am modest, they would think I am pompous!”. Well! Let them! Let them think whatever they want. We are not talking about them! We are talking about you today and let’s stick to that. We can worry about them tomorrow!

How do you feel when you use these words about yourself? Don’t you feel special? Don’t you feel beautiful? Don’t you feel that you are unique?

Truth is that all of us are blessed with our own beauty and our own uniqueness in life. Sometimes we don’t tend to give it the appreciation or acknowledgement it deserves. Try doing that and you may open yourselves to a completely new world! Stand in front of the mirror now and see how beautiful you actually are. All the parts in your face is exclusively made for you and you are one rare piece of art to be loved and appreciated. Take time, observe all your features carefully and you will see a more beautiful person in the mirror, the one who will make you happy.

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This Post Has 27 Comments

  1. Shilpa Garg

    I just loved the video and the way your article talks to describe oneself :)

  2. Vinay Nagaraju

    Thank you Priyashi :). I loved the video from the time I saw it, in a time when almost all advertising products are trying to say why they should use them, there is one company who are willing to take the responsible route and show what really means and what true beauty is. A very empowering factor indeed :)

  3. Anusree

    We can definitely worry about them tomorrow Vinay!! :)

  4. Vinay Nagaraju

    Thank you Shivani for sharing the link. It is a beautiful article :) .

    I agree, it is all about loving oneself! I have detested the idea of blind aping of the west and the way it is shown as a perfect life. The idea of steroids or ‘healthy’ snacks that have come up which have replaced real fresh foods, the idea of body building replacing sports is a little absurd. Somehow I feel that there should be a balance somewhere to realize how important things are in our life and to know that the world really does revolve around our own selves.

    The story is well portrayed Shivani, well built through the factors which have constantly been in question but not voicefully enough. Enjoyed reading it :)

    1. Shivani

      Thank You Vinay for going through my post. Glad you enjoyed reading through my exhaustive post. Grateful for that…really. :)

      1. Vinay Nagaraju

        :).. It has nicely portrayed the views and the questions Shivani.. Nice stuff :)

    2. Shivani

      Also Vinay with ur permission can i copy paste this comment of urs and post it there in my comment box with ur name there. U know why,,,don’t have to explain…some strength in solidarity and together we can forcefully voice it…what say you???

      1. Vinay Nagaraju

        Sure Shivani, please feel free to :).. I’d be happy to see it there :) and yes you are right, no need to explain :)

  5. Shweta Dave

    Isn’t beauty relative Vinay? Our close ones are always biased towards us! Plus there is also an essence of perception management that works. In todays’ world it has gone beyond looks, it is more on what is one’s connect with the other and thus would define beauty. How would the virtual world of internet that we all belong throng if looks was teh only thing that mattered! (P.S. I could not play the video as I am on restricted network :()

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      I really wish you could have played that video Shweta :). The video talks about beauty and perception and how each of us look at ourselves in life, the words we use to describe ourselves. It talks about appreciating oneself and find true beauty through our own eyes..

  6. Alok Vats

    Well it hardly matters if you are looking ugly or what to others. I have seen people who were real ugly looking, but they know how to enjoy in their life, or how to live a good life and hence their life was not at all uglier. Thank you so much Vinay for sharing this video and as Ruchi said that Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder, it is very much true…

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      Thank you Alok :). I loved this video to the core. It says so much about the power of definitions and descriptions and also conveys a strong message saying that we are always the ones in control about how we feel about a particular issue or situation.

      Glad to know that you liked the video :)

  7. Vidhya Rao

    I have seen this video before and I have watched it a 100 times and shared it too a year or so back. I guess even though we all have been taught to love ourselves the way we are and concentrate on the inner beauty, we very much need this dose of re-instating this faith in us every now and then. Thanks for re-introducing the video and the thought behind it.

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      Awesome!! I very much agree Vidhya :). We need a constant dose of that thought to reinforce that belief in ourselves. The more we do it, the better we get at it and slowly it becomes an inseparable part of our lives :)

  8. Ruchi Chopra

    Its a video which gives you one compelling message-Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder, kinda resonates with this quote well. If a person often thinks & lack on its physical attributes, a compliments from strangers & known person can boost the self-esteem. We all have that craving to be appreciated in every other ways :-) :-) I liked this video thought. Ty for giving us all Gyaan everyday with your wonderful blog.

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      Thank you Ruchi :). Or as the modern parlance says, beauty lies in the eye of the beer holder :P :D .

      I guess all these compliments and self appreciation builds us some confidence about ourselves, it makes acknowledgement even easier and better. True that,, probably the need for attention and compliment is never ending that way.

      Glad that you liked the video Ruchi, it was hard to resist sharing it :)

  9. Shivani

    You know Vinay i did a post once which sort of resonates with some if not all of what u have so wonderfully explained. i have my own observation about what you’ve just talked about. Much against the narcissism that is the order of the day today i have had experience of a different kind. i actually hated growing up the way i looked. i was never happy about i appeared to me when i saw myself in the mirror. So was the case with most of my friends. So the question of being modest about it didn’t arise. We grew up always wanting to be someone else. Look like someone else. You know what i mean. It is only now that i have found that truce with myself and feel blessed. Lot goes into it as to why that happens if it happens. If u r interested read my post titled “Truce” and u shall know my truth.
    Thank you for raising this topic. Needs so much to be discussed. :)

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      Thank you Shivani. I would love to have a look at that post. Kindly do share the link :).

      It is really nice of you to share you personal experience Shivani :). I agree, the world has now seemed to move a little toward narcissism, thanks to the commercials I guess or maybe the different idea of education. I do understand the situation cos I had something similar growing up and it did take a long time for me to even acknowledge or appreciate. I would shun the compliments and wouldnt even believe them. I was sorta convinced with me idea of myself, but this video and also a few experiences have made thoughts turn around a bit and it does feel good this way :)

      Glad you liked the topic Shivani :)

  10. Anawn Imiss

    I think the whole concept is flawed because it really doesn’t mean anything. Tall means different things to different people, you know! And by using terms like tall/short, fair/dark, slim/fat, we’re only making comparisons, which hurts our self-image. People need to realize this :-)

    1. Vinay Nagaraju

      It indeed is Ana :). Different cultures view it differently.

      I was reading one book where they talk about the fair/dark skin debate which goes to say very well that if in India, we were ruled by a race which was darker in skin, perhaps the association of beauty would have been to dark skin as well. Esp the 10th century tenets talk about darkness as a symbol of beauty. It is only after the winds of change, the perspectives also seem to have changed a little. I can’t help but wonder how different it would have been :)

      1. Anawn Imiss

        Even if the rulers had been dark-skinned and the scales were tipped in the favor of dark/dusky skin, it would still have been an unfriendly world for some people. Then grandmothers would taunt little girls saying they were too fair to get married.

        1. Vinay Nagaraju

          He he, that’s true too. I guess there will always be a view no matter what we do in life :) . Nice point! :)

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