“Hey! How nice to see you.” I heard a voice from behind. I turned back to see who was feeling nice to see me :D Well that’s when I discovered that the nice feeling was for my friend. They were her other gang of friends. All these people started talking and had a gala time for more than 2o minutes. I was standing right beside my friend working like a pendulum moving by eyeballs from one person to another. My idiotic friend didn’t introduce me at all; it’s not that she had a charming boy in the group, she basically doesn’t have that as a practice.I was bored and one question bothered me a lot. “Why don’t people introduce each other?”
Haven’t you experienced such situations? Where you feel uncomfortable trying to avoid eye-contact with others, trying to control your laughter at their jokes, putting on the subtle look on your face, looking at your phones often and wondering “Why the hell people don’t call or message you at the right time!” and most importantly getting bored. Fair emotions and reactions! You are not introduced to them and how can you bring out your reactions as natural as always. Even though you want to be natural something hinders you and your reactions.
Why don’t people do it?
When I asked my friend the same she replied “Oh! Hmm…” Well she meant she hadn’t realized at all. And there are a few who don’t see the need for it, a few who have never given a thought about it and a few who gets completely lost in their own new world and forget about it. Do you also do the same? If so, what is your reason?
Why should people do it?
Clearly because it’s a nice gesture and it kills the upcoming awkward moments. You get to talk to new people upon introducing. Acquaintance may turn into new friends, new friends may turn into good friends, and good friends may turn into love interests and… Well I think I am going off the topic now :) Basically you feel good and you get to exchange a few smiles and laughter and most important you feel comfortable with new people and don’t get bored easily.
How to do it?
Just do it! Being natural is the easiest and the quickest way. If you are looking to be creative and impressive then you can try identifying the similar qualities between the two and try introducing each other(mostly keep it to the good qualities :) ) Ex: Hey he is a great fan of Kishore Kumar, just like you . You can also try adding adjectives like-a good friend, humorous guy, sweet person, ever smiling girl, smart guy…….. again mostly positive adjectives :)
Sometimes I have met a few people who introduce lamely “abc this is xyz and xyz this is abc!” What relation do you have with the two? Both abc and xyz keep wondering . It adds a lot of value if you also mention how the person is related to you. You are meant to remove the awkwardness of people and saying just the names won’t help much.
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What if they don’t do it?
Introduce yourself! I know it sounds awkward. Probably much more awkward than facing awkward moments with them but it’s that the awkwardness remains for a fraction of seconds and aah! You feel comfortable after that and you start enjoying the conversation. But how can you do it without being sheepish?
Smile – Initial and the most essential step to be followed in solving most of the problems of life. Smiling often can help you a lot. Smile attracts people and they would want to talk to you.
If you get to know the name of the person lean forward to introduce yourself by calling out his name, say “Hi abc, I am xyz. How are you doing?”
Use a little mockery at your friend so that he receives a warning “My friend is so happy to see you that he forgot to introduce us.” (*politeness must!)
Blame your friend-“My friend always does the same, he doesn’t introduce. “Hi I am xyz“ lean forward for an handshake (*politeness must! *broader smile)
“I have heard a lot about you from my friend Mr.abc, how nice to meet you” Use this if you are genuinely interested in knowing.
In the end it’s mostly about you feeling good. That’s ok if your friends don’t introduce you to someone else, take initiative and introduce yourself, it’s more about you feeling comfortable and nice. And one thing you can be sure of is that when you get to meet new people you get to learn more and it always enhances your personality :)
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Ha ha Amruta you know how to have fun :)
I do the same these days. I can’t afford to miss the fun and can’t even think of getting bored so I better introduce myself.
No Sid. That was the experience which made me think about the need for introduction and after that when I faced situations like this I did introduce myself. My favourite way is this “I have heard a lot about you from my friend Mr.abc, how nice to meet you.” :D has worked well so far
Haha..nice reading this …it happens ..really..and quite awkward a situation. A little smile and a small ‘hello’ are though enough to avoid such embarrassment… :-)
Nice tips. It will certainly help break the ice. But some people keep such a strong wall of impregnable silence that it may be difficult to go near them, let alone say hello.
Thank you Abhijit :). True, there will always be the extreme ones, either on the gregarious end or on the limited front. I guess such ones are better left alone sometimes :)
Ha ha, nice post Vinay. Really enjoyed reading it. You know what normally what happens, when someone brings his or her friend to a party and the moment they enters into the party, the person who brings other one, actually got engaged with so many things that it becomes hard to introduce his/her friend to others.
You cannot accuse her for this, you should understand how popular is your friend among her circle… :)
Thanks Alok :).. He he, that’s true, normally it happens by an oversight and somehow it just misses the mind. Social interactions are certainly not the simplest of the lot :)
Thank you Nethra :) Ha ha I am on a venture to attract abc and co ;)
Your comment reminded me a few lines
“Because I was more often happy for other people, I got to spend more time being happy. And as I saw more light in everybody else, I seemed to have more myself.” – Victoria Moran
Well, that is awkward …..Can’t remember if I was in your situation but it is against my basic etiquette to indulge in a disconnected way….It’s almost lame for me when your friend said “She hasn’t realized it…” I hope she or anyone who has been in yours or her shoes learn from this post…Thanks for sharing your experience Vidya and intorudcing such characters in life.
Vidhya there are a few who are lost in their own worlds and she is one such. I have come across many of them who don’t realise the need of basic communication and I am quite used to it now and I get busy trying out funny ways to keep myself entertained:D
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Ha ha Amruta you know how to have fun :)
I do the same these days. I can’t afford to miss the fun and can’t even think of getting bored so I better introduce myself.
No Sid. That was the experience which made me think about the need for introduction and after that when I faced situations like this I did introduce myself. My favourite way is this “I have heard a lot about you from my friend Mr.abc, how nice to meet you.” :D has worked well so far
Haha..nice reading this …it happens ..really..and quite awkward a situation. A little smile and a small ‘hello’ are though enough to avoid such embarrassment… :-)
Thank you Maniparna. I have been a victim of many awkward situations :D
Yea smile and hello is the quickest and easiest.
Been there, but somehow never done that.
Nice tips. It will certainly help break the ice. But some people keep such a strong wall of impregnable silence that it may be difficult to go near them, let alone say hello.
Thank you Abhijit :). True, there will always be the extreme ones, either on the gregarious end or on the limited front. I guess such ones are better left alone sometimes :)
Ha ha, nice post Vinay. Really enjoyed reading it. You know what normally what happens, when someone brings his or her friend to a party and the moment they enters into the party, the person who brings other one, actually got engaged with so many things that it becomes hard to introduce his/her friend to others.
You cannot accuse her for this, you should understand how popular is your friend among her circle… :)
Thanks Alok :).. He he, that’s true, normally it happens by an oversight and somehow it just misses the mind. Social interactions are certainly not the simplest of the lot :)
A nice post, this happened to me many times so, as a learning I always introduce people to each other. :)
Thank you Datta :). That’s a nice thing to do, helps come over that moment of awkwardness :)
Thank you Nethra :) Ha ha I am on a venture to attract abc and co ;)
Your comment reminded me a few lines
“Because I was more often happy for other people, I got to spend more time being happy. And as I saw more light in everybody else, I seemed to have more myself.” – Victoria Moran
Well, that is awkward …..Can’t remember if I was in your situation but it is against my basic etiquette to indulge in a disconnected way….It’s almost lame for me when your friend said “She hasn’t realized it…” I hope she or anyone who has been in yours or her shoes learn from this post…Thanks for sharing your experience Vidya and intorudcing such characters in life.
Vidhya there are a few who are lost in their own worlds and she is one such. I have come across many of them who don’t realise the need of basic communication and I am quite used to it now and I get busy trying out funny ways to keep myself entertained:D