Author: Preethi Anantha Narasimhan
5 Humble Requests
When I came out of my India as a student to UK, I met a lot of new people. Lot of wonderful people, some from India too. It was a very beautiful experience to come to a foreign country and settle in and study and make a new life out of the university! I’m sure that my fellow Indians who have stayed abroad will share my feeling :)
However, I’m also pretty sure that many of you have come across people from our very own India who have annoyed you to the bones! These are the kind that just take you for granted just because you too are from India and talked to you like you’re friends from time immemorial and given you free advice and acted as if he/she’s seen it all and done it all in life! Surprisingly though, I have met many Indians who feel the same way about other Indians here.
Here are 5 things I’d like to say to such people! (Hopefully excluding me ; ) :D )
I don’t want to be friends with every Indian I see!
Hello, I just met you, so don’t ‘tu-tu’ and ‘abbey’ me! I don’t go hug every one when I’m in my own country, what the hell happened? Would you have done the same if you’d met me in IIT Madras or IIM Ahmedabad?? Just because I’m in a foreign country, all Indians are suddenly my chuddy buddies, eh?!
Not that I don’t want to be friends with an Indian, but not solely because you’re an Indian! Come on! I need my time to get to know you! To me, before you’re an Indian, you’re just another person, so back off! I didn’t come here to make friends with every Indian I can spot!
Are you not a member of the _ _ _ “Indian Society”??
What?! I just came from India! And I have enough number of Indians in my life! Thank you but I’d rather spend time meeting people from all over the world. I love Indians, but what I’d love more is to meet people from different parts of the world who speak different languages and eat different kinds of food and treat people differently!
Yes, I don’t want to be stuck up meeting Indians who easily talk in Hindi in front of the one-poor-foreigner (who somehow got sucked into the group) who does not understand it! More so, not with those kind of Indians who have fun at his expense!
And for all you know, I might not even know Hindi just becauseIm from India. And I might not even want to learn it!
So yes, stop forcing me to go to every other Indian society party! every-damn-week!
Thanks! But no free advice please!
Just because you’re from the same country as me, doesn’t mean you’ve had the same life as me. So before you go all “don’t you know this?? You should do this” “haven’t you ever?! You should try that” “you’ve never…??You must go here” look at your sorry face!
Grow up! Everybody is different!
And people will do what they want and like to do whether or not you ‘advice’ them to. When I’m smiling and saying yeah, trust me, I’m trying hard to keep my fist down! Don’t give me gyaan just because you’re from the same country I’m from. My ‘gyan’ to you instead is to use the time to grow up!
So are you in a relationship??? Tell me about him/her!!
Excuse me? Do I know you?! At allll????
I just met you! What makes you think I’m going to discuss my relationship with an utter stranger!??! Its my private life! Do you go about asking that to every westerner you’ve just met a week back?? I’m also another human being and I choose people I want to talk to! And if at all I do tell you, it’s because I’ve made a friend in you! Not just because you’re from my country.
I’m also another human being and I choose people I want to talk to! And if at all I do tell you, it’s because I’ve made a friend in you! Not just because you’re from my country.
How do you eat this ‘ghaas-phoos’? Try this na, just once..
Would you dare say that to a vegetarian westerner?? Why! You’re sure you’ll get a pretty nasty answer! What makes you think I’ll not be offended when you say that? Or are you plain insensitive and don’t care?? Don’t talk down to a vegetarian!
Every vegetarian is a vegetarian because of his or her own different reason and whatever it is, it is none of your goddamn businesses! So do not try to make us change our habits, how often do you see a vegetarian Indian asking you to stop eating non-veg!? If we do, it’s probably to tell you in your own language to mind your business!
All said and done, I love India and Indians are still the most amazing people you can meet!There are just these handful of such selected specimens (unfortunately very high in numbers in a foreign country compared to the people in entire India put together) that you need to avoid :D otherwise, we are the best ;)
There are just these handful of such selected specimens (unfortunately very high in numbers in a foreign country compared to the people in entire India put together) that you need to avoid :D otherwise, we are the best ;)
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Haha… Annoy me to the bones?? Because of selected high numbered specimens… I too experience more or less same, though the chances will be high to experience it differently when I will be in abroad ;) Good points… yup we are still the best :)
You are inspiring me write a post on similar lines Vinay… LOL…
One kind of Indian species that I have encountered is the ‘snooty’ lot… who think they are god’s gift to mankind just because they live in firang-land… now that is something I just cannot fathom… when and how they developed invisible wings is something I am yet to understand… oh well… to each their own!!
But I agree, some of them make quite a spectacle of themselves….
Haha i totally get what you mean, I have seen some too that belong to this category.. at some level I feel sorry for them. :P but its extremely annoying at the same time.
Would love to read your post about it.:) Im sure there are many others who would have met such ‘superior’ beings ;)
A nice post with the right touch of humour drawing attentin to some home truths!
Thank you :)
Have you written my heart out in this post? I so agree with all you say, the over friendliness, the language, the questions around me being veggie all of it…well now I have ways of handling it well :)
Haha yeah, believe me, I know how many of us feel this way. :D
Its really annoying to have to deal with it! But yeah, I guess we develop our own ways of handling it. Well, punching is still a crime, I HAVE to deal with it some other way ;)
These things come over every where you go. I was once questioned that whether I am a cannibal or not ( I am an omnivore) I could not understand whether I should face palm or laugh and I never went out of India. Free Advice is a birth right of some and not listening is mine :) A good post.
oh god, its such a shame that people take liberty to ask things they shouldnt be! Yeah, free advice is another national disease im beginning to think :D
thanks you for your comment:)
Bingo. The excessive display of familiarity often amounts to encroachment into the personal space that is best avoided. At times it also hinders in the development of an open mindset towards the mainstream culture.
Yeah, exactly how I feel about assuming familiarity. Its unnecessary, and like you say, it does affect our social openness.
Yeah..sometimes people go way beyond their limits. Have heard of similar experiences from my friends, too. Such things can be really annoying especially when you’re in a new country trying to adjust yourself with new customs and culture.
True that! to me, it just was appalling and shocking that I had to meet such people after coming so far away from India. And somehow, having known larger circles in India, the number of such people I have come across back home is negligible !