If your friends judge you because of the clothes you wear then you need new friends not a new suit!
One of the greatest delights of reading a good book is the way an author represents an idea and tries to build a premise around it. One such statement which made me stop on my track was this one when I was reading this book – “The Richest Man in Babylon” by George.S.Clason known to be among the top motivational books of all time and also an interesting book for someone who really wants to become rich ;).
I guess as we all grow up, we are subject to constant judgement around us, sometimes by our friends, some relatives, some family members, some of it our own. Of the many things people judge us on, it maybe the kind of erasers we carried to school when we were kids, maybe an expensive cricket bat or a ball. As we slightly grew up, the focus seemed to go towards the nice bicycles we got to ride and then it was the bikes followed by now the cars! I guess it is a constantly evolving process on its own. Some may disagree with me when I say this, I completely respect your thoughts but I guess atleast to a certain extent judgement does exist around us.
So, how do we deal with it? How do we deal with so many people constantly judging us? Well I guess the answer is easy – You don’t have to.. I do understand the urge to answer to a lot of people, especially when they try to undermine us – The mind goes –“How dare they insult me? They don’t know who they are dealing with! I need to give them a piece of my mind!”. Well I can assure you that I have been there constantly but something else I have come to realize is that you can’t stop them all! The more we keep responding to these, the more energy it drains out of us, not leaving much with us to relish. But there is something even stronger than reaction – It is response!
I do agree that both of them sound the same but with a very slight difference between the two. The reaction is our immediate response, more like a knee jerk while a response has a slight time lag in it. “So what?! Big deal! Right?” Well I guess it does make that big deal if we try and use it to our advantage. In the previous scenario a reaction to judgement can be talking to them and explaining and probably even yelling. The response can be to realize that it might just end up draining your energy more which can be better used somewhere.
I think as long as we are comfortable with who we are and what we do, the rest of the things in the world hardly seem to matter. I am not going to advocate a theory where we are completely dissociated from it. Some maybe strong enough to do it but I assure you that I am as weak as I sound here 😀 .. I think even those emotions of discomfort have a very strong role to play in our lives and they keep influencing us, maybe testing us to see how we respond to them or if we respond to them. End of the day I believe all these emotions are there for a reason, and they are trying to send a message to us.. And sometimes the message can be as simple as changing the circle you are in.. It may not mean that you have to shun everyone around you physcially, but you can always be a part of the society without being a part of it! A line in Bhagawadgita explains how a lotus plant is a part of water and yet does not allow that to influence it, maybe something in similar lines here, but a little simpler ;)..
Society need not be right