We have often wondered what if certain things would not have happened in life! What if things would always happen like the way we planned or the way we hoped them to be. Well its not too much of a news but more often than not things are not going to happen the way we want them to. The question is, what are we going to do about it? There are of course multiple options
Blame Game – There is always someone who can take the blame including ourselves or a part of ourselves or a characteristic of ours. Well it is the easiest choice isn’t it? Of course the blame is passed, we feel less responsible about things and well it is done. A huge load off our back. But does that solve the problem we are having? Or is it just a way we find to tell ourselves that things are not as bad since it is not the fault which I would be responsible for.
Denial – Saying that something like this never happened. Taking the complete theory off the table and telling yourself and others that the unfavourable situation never crept in or never shook your boat. Maybe it is an easy way out, but isn’t it an escape?
Accept it – Well I do agree it is one of the most uncomfortable thing to do. Doesn’t come easy cos it hurts to take a blame and responsilibilty about it. But how bad is it? Why don’t we accept things and say well it is something which is in my domain and so is the solution. The trick is, when we take responsibility of things, more often than not, we go after a solution. When the blame is on others, it is an easy way to say it is someone else’s fault and there is nothing we need to do about it. There is no fixation on our own to solve the situation. But at this end, once we own up to something, we can always find a way out.
Look for the solution – Don’t blame the messenger, don’t crucify him either. The messenger, in this case your mind is just conveying you as to what is not working and what the problem is. Appreciate its role, think of what can be done to sort this out and try acting on it. The solution was never in lamenting about a problem. The lamenting can sometimes provide you a comfort but not the solution. We need to ask ourselves as to what is important? Is it the problem or is it the solution to the problem which can set you free?!
The final bit is, it is never is that important as to what happens to you, but what you do about it, goes a long way..