Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
-Dalai Lama XIV (Tenzin Gyatso)
My friend had broken-up with her boyfriend from a long-term relationship. Sadness had embraced her from all sides and on bonus to it the last semester results were announced and she had flunked in a subject(this meant her job opportunity was out of hand). It looked as if all her nightmares were turning into reality. She was devastated.. that’s what she said when I asked “How are you doing?” We tried to cheer her up but she preferred to feel sorry about herself for long. One day while we were busy chit chatting in college, she started her sad story, we didn’t give much of an attention as it was her 6th time repeating it ( Most of us recited her words in our minds as we knew what would come after what 🙂 ) She concluded her story saying “I am tired of all this, I want some happiness in life….I have been waiting for it…… Oh! My life is so sad!” One of my friend stood up and angrily said “Keep waiting for another 40 years! It will never come! When you want it you have to go get it!! “
We had a lot of unwelcome attention by now and I was expecting her to burst into tears but surprisingly she accepted his advice and his words left an impression on her. This incident helped her realize how important it was to end self-sympathy and start focusing on things that make her happy. She started working on her interests, kept herself engaged and gradually took away the misery of her life. She focused on her positives and she made sure she remained with happy people around and today she is a lot happier than before and she says she is in a better job than the one which was offered earlier and she knows how to keep herself happy 🙂
Probably that’s what we should do when we feel unhappy. Go out, feel fresh air, appreciate nature, smile often (that’s OK if you look stupid initially 🙂 )surround yourself with happy and wonderful people who ignore the concept of sympathy, show gratitude for the beautiful life you are gifted with (Why should I be thankful?) , work on things that make you happy , read good books, sing loud and dance carefree and make sure you are always engaged to do things that make you feel good. Everything will fall in place gradually and you will find yourself happy 🙂
As I have been answering questions on few forums I couldn’t ignore noticing how many people ask questions on being happy. The popular question is “Where to find happiness” I have questioned myself to understand whether it is really hard to find? I haven’t experienced much of sadness in my life (touch-wood!) I am sure few miseries and disasters of life are never easy to forget and move ahead. It takes time and many might change your life but worrying for small things and concluding not to find happiness is like shutting down your minds not to look ahead. Everybody has their bits of sad moments in life with different intensities but when we can take actions to create the life we want we certainly can take actions to create happiness.I am sure they have certain challenges and obstacles to accomplish but its worth the try.
This reminds of the legendary 🙂 dialogue of Barney Stinson “When I’m sad I stop being sad and be awesome instead!” from the series How I Met Your Mother 🙂