Pre Marital Potency Test
“Wow! This is a new level of debate” I thought as I was looking at a debate on television today and honestly I was quite stunned at it.
The bulletin board said
“Madras High Court suggests pre marital potency tests”
I am still reeling from a shock that a court suggested it. Although if I try to understand why they said this, the possible explanations might be
– Not having a child as the main reason for divorce
– Dowry harassment cases
– The woman being blamed and shunned in the society
and so on, but I still don’t understand what it has got to do with marriage. I always thought marriages were about two people, leading a life together, sharing and growing together and completing their lives. I agree that having a child is a part of a family and is a nice thing but is that all there is to a marriage?
Some of the points in the debate included
1) We want to bring down the cases of divorce
Well, maybe you will be able to solve about 1% of the cases with this solution, but is that what you are looking at? Shouldn’t you or I be looking at marriage as a sanctity, a relationship, a bond between two lives? When did it get so commercial?
2) Such tests will bring down the cases of dowry
I am still trying to understand how. Honestly I don’t think that this is in any way related to dowry or anything that comes to the life between the two.
3) Someone even went ahead and said – “How do we test these cases”
My question is still very basic, before I go to HOW, I would rather ask why? I still feel that it is a very dishonorable way of looking at it. I do agree that people have a lot of differences and sometimes it gets unbearable. If you are worried about dowry, then don’t give it, why do you want to believe in the concept of buying a nice fancy groom on sale? Or maybe go to a matrimonial site and see if there is any discount available for him?
And what has that groom done to get a dowry or a down payment? Is it because he has a great job? Is it because he has achieved some things in life which no one else has? Or does it mean that it is going to keep your daughter happy?
I think it is about time that we move on from this idea of “Arranged Marriages” where the arrangement is finance, power, position, status and most annoyingly caste. It is time that we grow beyond these shackles of life and be with someone cos we like being with them, period. There is nothing more needed to it. I can listen to a few people say that I am being idealistic or naive when I say this, but I would rather be idealistic than being so materialistic!
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