I came across this question in Quora today which set me to a thought. As you know, we love these debates and would like to discuss this one today. The immediate reaction of mine to this question is YES with the basic assumption that I am a soft hearted person. If I try to play the devil’s advocate, I feel like saying NO, it is absolutely absurd to think of it that way.
The Case For Yes
It so happens that a sensitive person ‘Feels’ that he or she is quite often taken advantage of. There have been instances where their voice hasn’t been heard. There have been instances where these soft hearted ones are pushed over and people don’t seem to walk all over them. And even when these soft hearted ones say that they don’t like something, people don’t seem to give much of an attention because the law is pretty simple – “Crying baby gets the most attention”. The good ones will never be noticed and even if they are, they are usually taken for granted.
There have been a lot of times where I have felt this and I have wondered, how come people are so mean – How can they even think of taking advantage of someone. How can they take us for granted when we are so careful about each and every emotion of theirs and try to make sure that we don’t pass the boundaries. It feels so unfair that they do not extend the same courtesy to us.
Then there is another simple statement that comes to my mind – “People are just people” They all respond the way they would like to be responded to. They give attention to us only when we respond to the way they are trained. It would be incredibly naive of us to think that the world works in the same rules as we do.
The Case For No!
The case for this is simply that, if we let someone take advantage of us, it is completely our fault. We all have a private space and we need to guard that very carefully. Given an opportunity, people will walk all over you and pretend as if nothing happened. I don’t want to sound like a cynic but that’s kinda the way the world works, it doesn’t necessarily changed its approach just because you or I are soft hearted. If we think something is precious, it is our absolute responsibility to take care of it and sometimes it also means that we would have to do the things we are not used to. That doesn’t mean that the world is a bad place or people constantly take advantage, it just means that our responsibility extends beyond saying – “I am like this and the world should adjust itself accordingly”.
The world knows little about how you are or I am, the world doesn’t have enough time or patience to understand each one of us individually. There are times when we will have to identify which ones to take seriously and which ones to ward off. We need to create those boundaries and establish a perimeter which people can cross or not.
Of course it hurts when people don’t respond the way you want them to, especially when you are emotionally cornered and down. But that’s no reason to shy away from the responsibilities. It is a great thing to be a sensitive person, but it is a greater thing to protect yourself in such a way that you remain one.
Well, that’s as far as our imagination stretches, what do you think about these soft hearted people?
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