How to communicate

how to communicate, internal communication, external communication, agenda of communication

 Communication has always been one of the most interesting ways to express thoughts, ideas and come to an understanding. It can make or break the idea, bring things the way you like them or take it completely against you. What defines an effective one on multiple scenarios? Here are a few thoughts that may help.


 1)    Internal communication

    • Talk to yourself internally; see how the content has an impact on you. Talk to yourself as to how you are going to approach. Create the flow, imagine yourself at the receiving end, cos lets face it, communication is going to be all about the other person in the end.
    • Choose your  words – be careful of what you want to talk about, words are a very powerful mode of thought, keep them mild, keep them simple, you are trying to win the conversation, not a trophy .

2)    External communication

    • Break the ice : Smile a lot, humor is a very powerful way to do this, take interest in his life and happenings. A meeting very rarely should feel like one, it is more of a friendly exchange
    • Listen: Very often, people think that communication is about talking, very surprisingly, it is more about listening. Person at the other end keeps giving you signals as to what he wants to hear about, it maybe through words, topics he wants to talk about, a smile or frown on his face, excitement in his voice and lot more. So…. Listen, not just through your ears but eyes as well.
    • Understand the situation, the state of mind of the other person. He will listen to you only if he chooses to. You shouldn’t be forcing an argument down his throat, let him seek.
    • Express gratitude – the other person is offering you something which is most precious – his TIME. Appreciate it, not just internally but also find ways to tell him the same.
    • When people react, they often react to their situation and rarely yours, so try and segregate the two. Understand what he is really trying to talk about

3)    What is the agenda of your communication?

    • Make sure you have a complete clarity about what you want to talk about and how. Run the story in your mind, communicate internally and it can translate into an effective external one
    • His ego is more important to you than him : No one will be in a position to like you when you hurt their ego. It is not about you being right there, it is about appreciating the other person and showing how much you do.
    • Do not argue: Very rare that you would be in a situation that you win an argument and the opposing person likes you. You are here to win the person, not a lawsuit, so try not to. I know it is the easiest thing to argue and justify our own self but that is not achieving the purpose

I guess the most important thing to know in communication is the other person and the point you are trying to make. As long as you are focused on these, the rest are simple known factors like smiling constantly, maintaining eye contact, using gesticulations, etc. I am sure you guys are well equipped to be doing all those.

Found a similar article on TIME MAGAZINE about communication. You might find it interesting.. Here you go –

5 secrets that will help improve communication skills