Do you always get what you deserve?

Posted on Posted in A-Z, LIfe's Questions

question cartoon, what is this world, world, good or bad?Have you ever asked this question in your life? I am sure if you are a normal human being like me then you would have definitely had this question and definitely more than once also. Esp when we are involved in so many things where we give our heart and soul and something or the other screws up, something goes wrong and the first question I would normally get in a such a situation is this

“What did I do to deserve that?”

And I do get a lot of answers but my most favourite one is this “NOTHING”. It is as if someone is playing a mean trick on me, putting me at a disadvantage and I also realize that I don’t like the situation I am in but what is that we do? Here are a few common questions which appear when in a situation like that

Do we always get what we deserve in life?

– My ideal answer is YES! But let us start with a more believable one – NO! I think that’s perhaps the first answer most of us get when we have faced something which we don’t like – the disappointments, the failures, the feeling of rejection and so many more emotions which put us down. And I do sometimes feel that we don’t always get what we deserve in life, we always get way less than that and somehow someway the person we hate tends to have an easier way around life and things always seem to work for him, EFFORTLESSLY!

I know you didn’t deserve it! 

man denying, denial in life, responsibility

– I sympathize with you, I really do! I really wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. But I guess that is not what I am here for, you really have some lovely people to do that for you. I am here to try and find a solution, a way out of this situation. I feel sorry for the pain and the embarrassment the situation has caused but that happened for a reason – to send you a message, the message can be as simple as it needed more hard work or a strategy needed revisiting or the timing was bad and so on.. But it never means this question below..

 Why me? 

– This is perhaps the stupidest question to ask! Not because it is something we normally do but cos it is not going to give you any answers you like. The most popular answers you get when you ask a question like this are – I am stupid, I am unlucky, people don’t like me, I am cursed, I am useless.. If you look at all these answers you can see that there is one thing in common. All of them are self defeating and none of them would lead you to anything productive.

What if you deserved it? 

– Although I would like to think that I didn’t really deserve what happened, the only solution that came from it was that I felt a little better, my ego felt a little better. It helped me let go of things at ease and find peace with myself and my inner self felt good about me. But the issue was never resolved. How often have we solved things which were other’s responsibility? Will we do it if we don’t take responsibility of what has happened to us. I do know that there are some situations in which it is impossible and unreasonable to take responsibillity on ourselves, but do it anyway. Not because it will shatter your ego but because that is the only way you can head to a solution.

So, do you actually deserve it?

who cares, no one cares why something happened, taking responsibility in life, denial

The answer is – Who cares? Atleast from the external world, no one cares, no one cares as to how many reasons you give for a justification, they will leave you with their own conception of the result and whoever it is they are going to blame, it is not going to make any difference to you. The society or people around you should not have that significant an impact on your thought. Tell yourself that you actually deserve it and be done with it. It does something wonderful, it brings that responsibility and ownership on you which naturally brings out the pursuit for solution as well.

Do not delve in the thought of a blame game, it is not going to do you any good. You need to solve your problem and you need to find the best foot forward to solve it, Your innate self may say that it is not responsible, but take it anyway, sometimes the solutions become a little more important.


27 thoughts on “Do you always get what you deserve?

  1. I agreed with your points usually if we are disappointed we say .. he got what he deserved etc..

    deserving something and getting something are tow very different things ..

    good points though.

    1. Thank you Bikram 🙂 . True, I think we find it easy to be objective about others and when it comes to ourselves, we do tend to get a little defensive and sympathetic. Although it is not the best approach, but I guess we can find it in ourselves to be a little sympathetic to others as well 🙂

    1. Not necessarily Pratikshya :). I think it is a fair truth, things will not always work our way and we need to go out of the way sometimes to make them happen, but I guess in the end, it is all worth it 🙂

  2. How u think so much positive & inspiring topics to write everyday 😀 So much gyaan, but its so worth-reading everyday,like reinstating my aspirations & dreams. Ty for sharing so much positivity daily. 🙂

    1. Thank you Ruchi :). I am still lagging behind the target I had in mind earlier. We are still posting at just 2 per day and it is really significantly short of what we had thought of earlier.

      Hopefully we will get to the magic number soon 🙂 . Thanks again for such lovely words, keeps us inspired 🙂

    1. True, I guess that’s very much in sync with the last thoughts of the post. Whether we deserve something or not, the truth we are left with is that it happens and we have to find a way to realize what we think we need or deserve 🙂

  3. Ahem-ahem.. I have got (some-times only :P). more then I deserved.

    point is no matter what ever good we get without lifting a finger we think we deserved more and spoils it, turning the good in to mediocre.

  4. Well honestly, I don’t always get what I deserve, if you ask anyone it will be the same response, even for me too it is valid, but then if you look upon my qualities, abilities, then you might think it in other ways too, like whatever I get is more than what I desire.

    So the same things will have different looks when you see from different angel. I do believe on one thing, whatever is coming to your life, accept it and move on.

  5. I agree these questions hit you as a multifaceted person who is juggling many roles at once, but personally I care less and keep doing things to the best of my abilities.

    1. Perhaps Karan. I guess while something is happening, we really do not have much time or emotions to think about what they exactly mean and we might not be able to implement them right away either.. But the last line you mentioned says it all. People defined these cos they needed words to explain the experience. But sometimes it pays to live beyond these words 🙂

  6. very inspiring indeed! your concluding lines are the best. we should not indulge into the blame game, rather try to find out a solution!

    1. Thank you Ratna. I guess when something has happened, it has happened. There really isn’t much we are going to get if we feel bad about it. The better thing to do is try and find a way out..

  7. “Who cares” Be done with it already. Learn if you can, try again, try something different. Go get it. Didn’t? World isn’t going to end. Have fun, move on! Deserving or not, find the best in what you have before it’s gone too!
    Good read Vinay 🙂

    1. Thanks Shanx :). He he, roger that matey! I sometimes am really fed up of all these definitions. They just make you curl up and feel bad about yourself. I feel like casting them all away !

  8. Vinay i am often troubled with this question. Sometimes even the best of intentions don’t produce the response that ought to have been. i just cry, take out my bhadaas in my blogs, sometimes speak my heart out to someone who has the time and patience and cares to listen but ultimately i guess it’s the inner self that does it. Doing anything and getting satisfaction from it whether it is recognized or not, credits are given or not does not matter…if u know what i mean. You do ur thing and you should feel happy about it.
    Of late i have been listening to Mr Sharath on Radio Fever at 6 in the morning and he touches this topic quite a lot. So many stories he tells and his stories are so logical that i get my answers. i feel calmer now. Felt like telling rather sharing all and also about Mr Sharath with you.
    Thanks for promoting my posts. Much that i enjoy reading ur posts i am grateful indeed for ur kindness towards mine. 🙂

    1. Thank you Shivani for sharing your thoughts and it is always nice to see such an honest response and to know that there was something in the article through which we could relate to you is a true success of the post 🙂

      I agree Shivani, even if we put the best foot forward it so happens sometimes that we get quashed either by our mistake or someone else’s. I did try a few things to get over it right from screaming at people offering a vent to the emotions and telling how unfair it was. But I think everytime I did that, I kept feeling bad about myself. Of late I have come to an understanding to accept that no matter what has happened, I deserved tht. Cos atleast that way I am acting on something than letting the situation control me.

      I completely get the feeling Shivani, the real truth of Karmayoga is something which I love reading and reciting, where we just do it cos we love doing it and the results are let to be taken care of by themselves.

      Aah that’s interesting, I haven’t heard Sharath on the radio fever. I’d like to read more about him, esp through the stories if they are accessible 🙂

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